Friday, March 1, 2013

Sometimes It Just Sucks

I post about a lot of things on this blog: religion, politics, spirituality mostly.  I have benefited a lot from journeying on the spiritual path, but you know what...

Sometimes it just sucks...

Whatever we learn, whatever insights we've gathered, however centered we can be at certain times, however books we've read, there can be something missing.

Sometimes there's a yawning chasm of loneliness and emptiness that overwhelms us, and sometimes it lasts for weeks. If we're lucky it lasts an afternoon.

In the past I may have believed that this means that I have done something wrong, or that I haven't grasped some spiritual truth.  But if I just stay in the moment without judgment, I can say, "You know what, Mark, you're lonely right now and it really blows...or sucks."

I am thankful for things that help me through such times - these include dark chocolate, red wine, and friends, but it can still suck. I have a yawning ache in my heart that brings me pain this afternoon.

It will pass. A soft caress, a held hand would be ideal. But give me chocolate and that will do. For now.

Mark Andrew Alward